Fear of commitment makes one susceptible to being enslaved by the pursuit of worldly desires.
When it’s recognized that you can experience suffering but not suffer directly, then suffering has value, then the seeds of suffering are burnt up through suffering instead of being propagated thereby.
God is omnipresent consciousness. Hir will is Your will. The ego’s will is an imposter.
How to know the difference? You don’t have to. Just pay attention to the subtle energy in your body, and notice what you’re thinking…the mind learns automatically to align with the Will of God because that’s what feels “right”.
There are people who walk this planet whose present purpose is to make suffering in the lives of other people, and especially the ones closest to them.
These people are immeasurably valuable, because they give their relations the experiences they need for their individual evolution and for the evolution of humanity. Once their loved ones get the message, these relationships either evolve or dissolve.
It’s one thing to tell the pain causing individual to take a hike, but that’s not going to matter much if the underlying energy hasn’t shifted. Indeed, when a “bad actor” is dismissed without awareness, it either opens the way for a similar one to enter, or it leads to the bitterness, resentment and feelings of disconnection that come with shutting people out.
The experience of being treated badly presents an opportunity to feel into the raw sensation of receiving that kind of treatment. This brings awareness to the effect your present way of relating has on your overall Wellbeing, which in turn transforms and opens the mind until it can dare to recognize everyone’s inherent worth.
Once such a worthy mindset arises, the mind can naturally release its need for painful relationships. In the meantime, and to expedite and ease this process, be willing to feel your feelings, and to stretch into a different, more empowered response when such an opportunity arises.
At times people may see you as disrespectful toward them even though you had no such intention.
It doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. It’s a depiction of how your mental energy is being interpreted.
Unless you are taking their perception of you personally or casting judgment on them for expressing their point of view, the mind is automatically learning to allow more loving kindness to be communicated through your expression.
But, if you get into spiritual dogma about how it’s all their perception, and you don’t care what anyone thinks – you are totally missing the lesson that comes through being perceived as disrespectful.
Through your perception, the mind can learn what’s necessary to give up resistance.
But while you’re unwilling to be honest about what’s being perceived, the mind learns to resist more, and that’s just not very much fun.
Can you sense that heart connection with someone you love?
Do you notice when your mind pursues certain thought, there is a deepening of that connection, and when other thoughts are pursued that connection is diminished?
Connection with loved ones are Life’s most precious gifts. To love carefully, just pay attention to your experience!
When we speak of sexual attraction to more than one person, we are speaking of attraction to thought. It’s been my experience and Tony’s that when such thoughts cross our awareness, we can sense that following them does not resonate with the heart’s present guidance, so they simply dissipate without any effort on our part.
We are both open to feeling something different, it just hasn’t happened since we met 2 decades ago.
Experiencing someone in a negative way does not make anyone less spiritual, and it does not necessarily mean they’re holding judgment.
In fact, to deny one’s own experience in favor of spiritual concepts is self judgment, and in that judgment, a lot of self talk happens while Love’s guidance is ignored.
Acknowledgment of experience does not turn into a projection of judgment unless it’s coupled with commentary about the experience.
By commentary, I mean ideas about what someone should or should not do, predictions about what will happen because of it, notions about what your experience says about anyone, etc.
Just the bald-ass experience is all that’s asking to be acknowledged, not any mental images or ideas about the experience. Call ‘em like you see ‘em and let the heart of hearts guide your actions accordingly. Aloha!!
Commitment to monogamous relationship isn’t meant to be about time – it’s only meant to last as long as both partners value this form of relating with one another.
If there’s a “cheater” in the relationship, no problem. The one who still values commitment, can simply refuse to carry on sexually with the one who doesn’t.