For a time, I thought that the spiritual concept “be impeccable with your words” meant that I needed to manage my own words as well as correct the words being used by others.
Whew! What a burden that was… And what a clever escape from putting my attention on what was really coming up for me.
Through experience, I have discovered that any words can be impeccable words…it’s not about the literal meaning of words at all, and it’s certainly not about which words other people use.
Impeccability has to do with speaking words that resonate in my heart with the presence of God’s love, and not speaking words that validate separation, fear and judgment.
But all of this actually begins in the mind, before any word is uttered. Once I have uttered words in sin (separation from God’s presence), that utterance becomes a gift of clarity as to what thoughts I’ve been making real by putting faith in their truth.
For instance, I felt mortified when Tony referred to my breasts as “little hangers” on our second date. He had no idea about my insecurity over my breasts being less buoyant after pregnancy and breast feeding.
He was simply acknowledging what was there and expressing appreciation for my body in his own words. In this way, his words were impeccable.
I, on the other hand, was like “what?! why do you think it’s ok to say that to me?”. The words I used were speaking to my personal insecurities about my breasts, and my utterance of them gave me instant awareness that I had been putting faith in the idea that my breasts were deficient.
My apparent lack of impeccability was a great gift because once I recognized where I had been taking myself in thought, I felt comfortable once again in my nakedness.
Of course, Tony never said anything like that to me again, because after hearing my response, he realized what those words meant from my point of view.