The Idea of Possessiveness

The idea of possessiveness (opposition to personal independence) was definitely something that made me give up the notion of long term relationships at a very young age. The moment a guy would give any hint that I wasn’t allowed to do things without him, I would say “no thank you”.

Relationships ended very quickly for me in this way, which suited me perfectly, as I’d rather have no relationship than one where I was required to lose my independence.

This energy played out with Tony very early on, when I used to like to party hardy with my friends. While Tony did not act particularly possessive, he communicated to me that he didn’t like my getting drunk in bars without him, sleeping at strange guys houses, and not coming back until the next day.

I communicated to him that that’s what I do, that I’m trustworthy and always feel safe, and if he couldn’t handle my lifestyle, then the relationship wasn’t going to work out. To my surprise and delight, he stuck around and possessiveness was not an issue. (I also naturally stopped partying like that after about a year together)

Fast forward to about 20 years later…I’m running around Hawaii with a dear friend a couple days a week, helping him to promote his business. It was apparent to me and Tony that this friend was trying to use everyone in his path to help pursue his own desires.

Well, intuition was telling me that I was going to give this friend an opportunity to use me in this way too. While I knew I could take a more comfortable path, my intuition was loud and clear in communicating that profound gifts would come through following my inner voice on this one.

Tony did not seem to understand my decision at all, and I could see that the situation was difficult for him. Some days when I would leave home, I would feel Tony so intensely that some of my muscles would tense up…I would immediately focus my breath on those tense muscles and invite them to relax while holding Tony in my mind and sensing our heart connection.

I have found that sensing the beautiful energy of our heart connection whether Tony seems to have difficulty with whatever I’m doing or not, is a powerful unifying force… because instead of pursuing thoughts of shame, rebellion or should’s, my mind stays focused on affirming the value of our heart connection.

There are plenty of thoughts that roam around in the mind looking to attach to someone in this sort of situation. Some of the thought scenarios are: He should let me do what I want, I deserve to be doing these things, Maybe I should get a divorce, What if I’m a bad wife, Why can’t he be more understanding? What if he goes for another woman?

But the thought that always sticks out in my mind is that no thought is true. So when this sort of doubtful energy arises in me, it’s my practice to experience the sensation of doubt and refocus my attention to sensing our heart connection, and that is all. Everything else worked itself out, and going through experiences like these has led to deeper connection and appreciation between me and my man than we’ve known before.

Not only that, but the gifts of heart opening and clarity from having the experience of associating with this particular friend keep unfolding. I am very grateful.

Much Aloha!!


Monogamy is a game for those who use commitment to get their desires fulfilled by another person.

But monogamy is a blessed gift for the ones who commit out of sincere mutual desire to focus all of their sexual energy toward one another.


It’s not mean spirited to withdraw attention from people. If they’re showing you something you don’t like, it’s ok to allow your attention aka life energy to be redirected.

This is the most natural movement, but it’s not likely to happen when judgments like meanness, wrongness or duty occupy your thinking.

Energy is our Gift

Our perception of our world is only a reflection of the self we have created out of thought. Perceiving through the eyes of the Divine comes from harmonious alignment with the core of beingness, not from anything outside of ourselves.

When we expect anyone or anything to behave according to our own will, we set conditions for our experience of Joy, thus setting ourselves up for disappointment.  But when we set the focus of our awareness upon that which we already enjoy, without attachment to how it may come or continue to come, the people and circumstance in our world receive an energetic invitation to shift into resonance with our new vibratory offering.

If they are prepared to shift their energy accordingly, our experience of them will change.   If they are not so prepared, they will fall away from our experience, making way for that which harmonizes with our energy of awareness.

However, when we are resistant to certain people, behavior or circumstance, we are resisting particular energetic patterns that reside within our Being.   By resisting any part of the self, our energy is given to reinforce the current that sustains what we are resisting; and we attract more material manifestations of it into our experience.

Acceptance is the key to allowing ourselves to perceive the reflection of our Joyful essence in this lifetime.   Only when Life is accepted in its fullness, does our individualized energy of awareness resound with the highest and deepest Joy/Peace/Love, thus allowing such Divine energy to be our gift for ourselves and for our world.

Speaking of giving, many times we give to “others” because we believe that someone needs our help, and/or we expect something in return.   Depending upon how much time, physical energy, money, fight, etc., we have given, we may create an esteemed self image in the world.

However, the belief that we are needed creates a feeling of obligation, while expecting something in return for our efforts creates attachment to outcomes. Both of these mental attitudes are dissonant to our Divine energy, which cannot be disturbed by anything in the material world.  That dissonance creates emotional disturbance which creates a disturbed perception of reality.

Giving that’s guided by disturbed feelings creates little or nothing of enduring value because it is our energy, not our action that determines the potency of our intent.   The energy that drives our efforts affects our shared reality in a way that cannot be quantified in the material world, and if our energy is disturbed we can only create more disturbance – even if we bring about measurable improvement on the physical/material level.

Conversely, when we direct our thoughts into vibratory harmony with our eternally Joyful essence, we glorify everything even if we do nothing at all. This is because our thoughts are always commanding creation, and when thinking arises from a vantage point that perceives what IS to be what is desired, reality unfolds in energetic harmony with our desires.

Accordingly, the most value anyone can bestow upon their world of form is the focusing of thought energy into harmony with Joy/Love/Peace. In this way, giving springs effortlessly from the abundance of the heart as we garner eternal blessings for our world.

Use what you perceive as the opposite of what you want to inspire your Divine creativity and bestow the gifts that endure forever.

Experienced yet Innocent

Your story is unique to you, but like you, everyone in the world has judged themselves as being a victim at some point in their life. That self judgment, created through your perception of your experience, formed a belief that you need to be in control – which attached to your awareness through emotion (energy in motion).

Unpleasant emotional energy consumes a portion of your limited awareness as egoic mind endeavors to protect you from the feeling by controlling the specifics of your life. However, ego only knows your own beliefs, thus it consumes much of your precious energy trying to figure Life out from a very limited resource of information.

Every time you perceive that something went “wrong”, which causes you to experience uncomfortable or painful emotion, more judgments are created about the egoic “need” to protect you from people, circumstances and even yourself. In this way, it’s natural to feel a greater need for control as you continue to accumulate life experience.

Just imagine if you could return to the innocence you were born with while still having the benefit of your experience for the adjustment of your perception. You can! And it starts with awareness of your perceived need to control anything, deep breath – and letting it go.

As you look for them, you will begin to see the self judgments that caused you to develop the perception that you “need” anything or that things “should” be different – and as you see, you are healed.

* Note: Ego is the master of illusion – it can hold many of your judgments and beliefs hidden beneath emotional layers that can divert your from the truth even as you are sincerely seeking it. If you are inspired to dissolve the trappings of mind, I encourage you to find someone willing and able to be your mirror for the purpose presenting you with what you are not seeing on your own. If you are interested in engaging my service for this purpose, please contact me via email.

Money is a Manifestation of Love

Many people mistakenly believe that money is a source of suffering. But in reality, there is no source of suffering. There is only perception of suffering to the extent that we do not allow our well being.

Nothing, except our thought energy, can detract from the Joyful perspective of source consciousness, which we were born to express.  Every human thought is source consciousness as it is filtered through beliefs held in the mind. Everything in our experience is a projection of our thought energy, and only through transforming our conscious and subconscious limiting beliefs can we achieve the results we desire.

The Joyful perspective of source consciousness belongs to everyone. It’s just a matter of focusing through the mind and not from it.

The practice of awareness in the present moment brings us closer to understanding truth that transcends material reality, and allows us to use our energy to bring blessings to the world.

In awareness, our perception of conflict is valuable because it is the energetic spark that inspires conscious creativity. However, if we find that anything in the world needs fixing, our mind is being controlled by our own egocentric sense of self importance, and creating energy that causes more manifestations of what we do not like.

No matter what form consciousness takes, if we depend on any circumstance for our sense of freedom and well being, we are creating emotional attachment. It is this attachment, not money or anything else, that is the root of all mental anguish.

Many well meaning people work very hard to change things they do not like about money, constantly battling greed, resentment, fear, and desperation. These people validate their ego by offering thoughts about how sorry they feel for the “victims” of our monetary system, and how they need to do something to help restrain the greedy people.

Any action steps taken from these mindsets emanate from emotion, and they provide comfort to the ego by creating a sense that the person is doing “good”. However, even if we achieve material results from our action, if that action emanated from a disturbing emotion, we have simply created more of the same energy we were aiming to abate.

Once we become aware of the mental concepts that create our dis-ease, we are prepared to create the total freedom and well being that is our birthright. But there is never any enduring value to action taken from within an emotional state.

Align your thoughts with Love around money and every other manifestation of conscious energy, and create more Joy in your experience through the power of Divine perspective.

Dealing Consciously with a Suicidal Friend

You are not the cause of anyone’s suffering, but whenever you experience anyones suffering, it becomes your responsibility. Your friend is not the self image that you hold of them in your mind.

Each person is a vehicle transporting a powerful being though this time-space environment, and every being is another aspect of the real You. If you could see people as they really are, you would know that the self image is only a projection of the belief patterns currently being followed by the ego.

The real Self orchestrates everything in our experience for the refinement of our being. A suicide experience is the culmination of all thoughts projected by the various egos through which the being has expressed over many lifetimes.

Self limiting beliefs create patterns of energy in our vibration that resist our true essence. The trials and tribulations (such as suicidal tendencies) to which the ego is subjected are for the purpose of exposing those resistant patterns, which creates opportunity for deep healing.

When anyone feels sorry for another person, they join in the other person’s suffering. By joining in the suffering of another, we add energy to current of resistance, which can only serve to reinforce that which keeps them bound to illusion and dis-ease.
When dealing with a suicidal friend, look past the surface of personal pain, and offer comfort to the inner being by seeing them for how they truly are – powerful and pure! From that perspective, you are adding to the energetic current of healing and total well being, and any action you take, If you are so inspired, will be much more effective.

It takes courage to be compassionate. Gather your strength from within, and you will prevail.

Related Article: Challenges are Opportunities

Life Force Energy is Creative Power

The same conscious energy that makes anything and everything possible is individually and simultaneously focused through everything and everyone that manifests in the physical world. What looks solid to the eye is actually energetic Light bodies through which conscious Life Force Energy is being projected.

The conscious energy that creates and sustains all Life causes everything in the material world to be made manifest for our experience through individual awareness. Humans have a unique creative vantage point in that the Life Force Energy is filtered through our individual mental patterns, and we are thereby able to specifically direct that energy to create our wishes, desires and dreams.

But because we have largely forgotten the source of our awareness, we are convinced that people, situations and things in our experience need to be changed. The belief that we must change anything causes us to focus on what we want changed, use mental cleverness to figure out how to effectuate the change, and employ our Will to create it.

While this method may produce some of intended results, those results do not come without struggle. Specifically, if during the process of attaining what we want, our thought vibration is resistant to the Living Energy that is the source of our Being, our experience is struggle.

Life Force Energy flows through us in specific vibratory rhythm, and to the degree that we project thoughts of ego dependency (need, manipulation, competition, etc.), our human vibratory rhythm becomes dissonant to Life Force Energy. Any dissonance to Life Force Energy is resistant to the very source of our human existence, and that resistance depletes our human energy – causing stress, lethargy, depression and anxiety.

While we can create some of the “improvements” we seek while in a resistant vibratory pattern, ultimately our resistance to Life Force Energy is the cause of all manifestations of personal and worldly dis-ease – everything from stress and illness to world wars.

When we believe that the cleverness of mind is the path to attain anything we seek, we feel an egocentric sense of self importance as our thoughts project the belief that we are nobly sacrificing our experience of Joy in the present moment to create a more desirable future. But when we sacrifice Joy in any moment we are sacrificing the flow of Life Force Energy through our material form.

In doing so, we not only sacrifice the energy necessary for creativity, play and Joyful expression, we sacrifice our real power to create what we want.

Conversely, when we accept and appreciate all things just as they are, and we allow ourselves to delight in the most Joyful possibilities we can imagine, we are allowing Life Force Energy to flow in exactly the way it was meant to. As we allow the gentle yet fierce flow of uninhibited Life Force Energy to be projected through our material form, we give more energy to ourselves while our wishes, dreams and desires are created for us in the unseen world.

In the flow of Life Force Energy, and through our willingness to take the first step as a leap of faith, the next steps in the progression toward our desires become obvious as we move Joyfully through time and space toward their manifestation.

Every moment is leading to the next, and we create our experience Joyful by laying the energetic foundation for Love, Joy and Peace. That energetic foundation is created by our thought projection, and it glorifies us to the degree that we have been allowing Life Force energy to be expressed unfettered by mental struggle.

Life Force Energy is our power to experience Joy in our lives, create what we want, and experience the deep peace that is our birthright. Start releasing the mental burden of needing to change anything, so that you may become the conduit for Joyful creation in this lifetime.

Related Article: The Rhythm of Deliberate Creation

Purposeful Change

Existence is energy in motion, constantly transmuting between form and formless. Change is the Universal constant that keeps expanding existence toward infinity.

Consciousness is the creative force that makes change possible. For without creative consciousness, there could be no perspective for change.

All living things are the extension of creative consciousness made manifest to benefit existence through individually focused perspectives in an environment of contrast. Planet Earth and all of its inhabitant life forms are vehicles for experiences that inspire the creativity that leads to the continual expansion of the Universe.

As individuals, we sense what is in our reality, and that causes us to project our preferences for change into the Universe. Those preferences are immediately created as energetic possibilities for our soul – which changes and expands the Universe.

While every preference confers a benefit to the Universe that is immediate and eternal, a preference only manifests in our individual experience when the energy of our beliefs becomes a vibratory match to it. By changing our beliefs accordingly, our material self expands toward the new possibilities we have created.

If our beliefs do not change, we energetically bind ourselves to the situations and circumstances that have already been created in our experience. In this way, we resist becoming unified with the possibilities we have created for what we would perceive as improvement.

Resistance to change doesn’t prevent us from being a benefit to existence because we continue projecting preferences for change until physical death.  But resistance does cause us to experience less Joy because our lives exist in a constant flow of energy, and when our energy is stagnant dis-ease becomes our experience.

Because it is the nature of the human ego to resist change within ourselves, we naturally seek happiness by changing and/or condemning the outside world. As we follow the nature of ego, we develop greater fear of true change because ego perceives inward change as death to itself.

Through resistance to change, we develop an egocentric sense of self importance and false pride, from which we employ hard work and dedication to manage worldly changes. In doing so, we manipulate people and situations to benefit our individual self (or our cause) as if we were disconnected from the balance of creation.

But outward changes in and of themselves only validate our egocentric fear of death, which causes us to worship the cleverness of mind as the creative master of our lives.  Since we are truly spiritual beings, we can never be fulfilled by outward achievements, and chasing them only leads to feelings of desperation and despair.

However, through inner focus coupled with the courage to harmonize with our preferences despite all external circumstances, outward change happens as the effortless manifestation of what we are becoming.  Moreover, when those changes are received with appreciation and humility, they glorify the core of our Being – which is the only part of ourselves that endures forever.

We are only capable of creating our reality from a self-centered perspective, and when we allow the energy of our beliefs to change with the constant development of our preferences, we cultivate our own peace of mind.  As we experience inner peace, we heal conflict and dis-ease in ourselves and in the world to which we are intricately connected.

That which we practice being is what we are becoming. When we practice being unified with our preferences, in appreciation of all that is, the things we achieve are simply the Joyful expression of what we are becoming.

There is nothing to do but relax into being the real You. Be the change you wish for the world and keep becoming toward the purpose of your inner Truth.